From Victim to Warrior, one step at a time

walking

If you’re like me, the idea of doing laundry doesn’t normally make you feel excited. But today is different.  For two months I’ve been unable to walk due to a broken ankle.  Now I’m finally working with physical therapy to practice walking.  Today for the first time in two months, I was able to use the crutch to go up and down the flight of 17 stairs to do laundry.  Granted the dryer is old so everything needs to be dried twice.  That’s three trips up AND down the stairs on a crutch for each load.  The surge of pride and feeling of usefulness is wonderful!

A Course in Miracles tells us you can change your mentality from that of a victim by simply making a decision. Say to yourself: I WANT to see this differently.  I could complain about my pain or inconvenience or frustration, all of which is very real  Because I live on a third floor walk-up, I’ve been “trapped” in my apartment for the last two months.

victim statusInstead I am focusing on what I CAN do, on what I have control over.  I CAN put 50% of my weight on my foot.  PROGRESS, not perfection!  I’m also gently reminding myself that I don’t need to be NEEDED to be VALUABLE.  That I can just BE.  And my usefulness to the Divine, and to my fellow men and women, is not determined by what I DO but by who I AM.

Albert Einstein said, “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”  This has been an opportunity for me to learn to ask for help and a chance for others to help me.  I’ve also developed a new appreciation for the ability to walk.   Slowly I’ve progressed from a knee scooter to a walker, from a cast to a boot.  Soon I will be able to walk my dog outside again (one of my favorite pasttimes), and this fills me with HOPE!  Emily Dickinson wrote:

“Hope” is the thing with feathers –

That perches in the soul –

And sings the tune without the words –

And never stops – at all –

What are you hopeful for? What keeps you going?  What are you thankful for?